6, Issue 1
MEATS OF EVIL
By Kurt Becker
INT. EVE’S HOUSE, BEDROOM – MORNING
Darkness. A PHONE is RINGING.
Shut up. Shut up. Shut up...
The RINGING STOPS. Then STARTS AGAIN.
A light comes on, illuminating a cramped, messy bedroom filled by a bed,
dresser, and nightstand. Various articles of clothing cover the floor
while posters adorn every inch of the walls. A teenage girl, EVE, sits
up in bed, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. She wears a stud in her nose
and has short, jet-black hair that she’s tied into a ponytail with
a rubber band. She sits, blinking her way to consciousness while the PHONE
CONTINUES TO RING. Eventually, she answers it.
INTERCUT WITH: INT. JEAN’S HOUSE, BEDROOM - SAME
A large bedroom dominated by a canopied bed and filled with expensive
furniture. Floor-to-ceiling windows stare down on a verdant green lawn.
Another teenager, JEAN, stands talking on a cordless phone as she picks
through a closet filled with expensive, designer clothing. Curly, auburn
hair falls down to her shoulders, framing her pale, freckled face.
Oh my God! I’ve been calling you all morning! Where have you been?
Well, Jean, I was lying here last night thinking of purple elephants until
Queen Mab rolled by - cricket-bone whip and all – and when I woke
up, you were yelling at me for sleeping in.
Shakespeare. Never mind. So what’s up?
When are we leaving?
Is it, now?
You remember our plans for Saturday?
You said you’d join me if I went to Heartland Farms?
The re-education facility? The one set up by that activist group?
Eve, I asked you two days ago!
CUT TO: INT. SCHOOL, CAFETERIA – DAY – FLASHBACK
A noisy, greasy-looking, school dining room filled with
the sounds of KIDS YELLING and SILVERWARE CLATTERING. Eve and Jean are
seated alone at the far end of a table. Eve is reading a magazine, oblivious
to the world around her.
Want to go to Heartland Farms this Saturday?
CUT BACK TO: INT. EVE’S HOUSE, BEDROOM – MORNING
See you in ten.
Eve hangs up.
INT. JEAN’S HOUSE, BATHROOM – SAME
A posh, carpeted washroom adorned with spotless white porcelain and sterling
Jean looks in a mirror as she puts on makeup.
INT. EVE’S HOUSE, BATHROOM – SAME
Plain white tile. Peeling wallpaper. A bathtub with yellow rings and a
torn shower curtain.
Eve gets ready for the day. She dunks her head underwater in the sink,
runs a comb through her hair, gargles once, and calls it good enough.
INT. JEAN’S HOUSE, BATHROOM – SAME
Jean stands, waiting for a set of curling rolls to warm up.
INT. EVE’S HOUSE, KITCHEN – SAME
Eve peruses the contents of a refrigerator. Her choices are limited to
Slim Jims, cheese, and Miller Lite. She discovers an apple and closes
EXT. JEAN’S HOUSE – DAY
An elegant, two-story Tudor-style mansion with a big driveway and a blue
Volkswagen bug sitting outside. Jean exits the house and gets in the VW.
EXT. EVE’S HOUSE – SAME
A single-story, vinyl sided-domicile with lawn gnomes and a solitary pink
flamingo guarding the front walk. Eve sits on the front stoop, eating
The SOUND OF A CAR APPROACHING is followed by SCREECHING
BRAKES as Jean’s VW squeals into frame; knocking over several trashcans
as it stops on the curb.
INT. CAR – DAY
Jean is driving. Eve is looking out the window.
Where’s your mom at?
The latest “Woman’s World” reported a Sean Penn sighting
in Williamsburg. She and a friend left at dawn this morning.
Did you see “Mystic River”?
It was okay.
So, what exactly is a “re-education facility”?
It’s like a children’s museum; they have all these informational
displays and programs aimed at promoting vegan and vegetarian living.
You’re not going to feel left out. They encourage people of all
diets to attend.
Since when have you been a vegetarian?
You went to a steak house for your brother’s birthday.
And I’ve since changed my ways.
It was last week!
Just trust me. You’ll love it.
INT. HEARTLAND FARMS, RE-EDUCATION CENTER - DAY
A dank and dimly lit room. Bare florescent bulbs illuminate A GROUP OF
TOURISTS standing behind a metal railing. The sounds of MOOING can be
heard from somewhere nearby. This, along with the SUDDEN ROAR OF A BUZZSAW
and PEALS OF HYSTERICAL LAUGHTER, make a few people look around nervously.
Eve and Jean stand at the front of the crowd. Jean is reading a pamphlet
titled “MEAT IS EVIL” with rapt interest while Eve just looks
Can we go now?
Did you know Heartland Farms is the largest Vegan Activist center in Eastern
HIGH-PITCHED SCREAMS and the ROAR OF A BUZZSAW echo from
I wanted to go to the mall today...
Listen to this: “Converts to a meatless lifestyle include Paul Newman,
Gwyneth Paltrow, the late Peter Sellers, David Duchovny...”
(Checking her watch)
If I kill you and steal your keys, I can make it there by four...
Can you at least feign interest?
Jean, Hitler was a vegetarian.
From overhead, a loudspeaker WHINES with FEEDBACK and SPITS
We at Heartland Farms want to thank you for participating in our re-education
program today! Please proceed out back through the double doors for the
final portion of today’s tour!
EXT. SLAUGHTERHOUSE YARD - DAY
Sunlight beams down. The tour group emerges into a small, fenced-in, dirt
yard outside the faded, red wooden walls of the slaughterhouse. As they
move further out into the yard, the stink of manure and burnt meat makes
several people cough.
EXT. CHUCK WAGON – CONTINUOUS
A faded, grease-stained chuck-wagon is where the stench emanates from.
Coming closer, we can see a charcoal grill where dark lumps resembling
burgers crackle and pop. The proprietor of this culinary eyesore is A
FAT COOK DRESSED AS A PIG wearing a chef’s apron and hat. He beckons
the group closer.
What the hell is this?
“The Final Temptation poses recruits with a choice; either forgo
the pig’s offer and convert to a vegan diet or indulge in the carnal
pleasure of edible murder.”
You’re kidding me...
Come on, sinners! Eat!!
Everyone looks at the grill. About a dozen burgers spit grease and sizzle
over hot coals. Some people look back to the slaughterhouse doors, remembering
the tour. Others mumble, ashamed, and back away. A few cry and curse the
pig’s lack of compassion. Eve steps forward and addresses the cook.
What’s the purpose of this?
Choose, child! Choose and be damned!!
This is ridiculous...
Is this how vegetarians are born? Do you just let asshole pigs yell at
you until you submit?
No! I’m sick of this fascist guilt-trip.
How much for a burger?
The price is your soul!
The cook flips a burger onto a bun and hands it to Eve.
Thus you taste the meats of Hell!
What are you doing?
Eve takes a bite. The rest of the tour group stares at her in shock.
How does it taste?
That is the taste of sin!
You want one?
A CRYING GIRL behind Jean and Eve pushes her way to the
front of the group.
What is wrong with you?!
I’m sorry. She’s carnivorous.
Were your eyes closed back there? Do you know what you’re eating?
No. I am completely ignorant of where meat comes from. Please tell me.
Jean notices how the horrified disbelief on the tourists’ faces
has been replaced by a growing anger. That, and how she and Eve are being
Y’know, some of us learned a valuable lesson today.
Funny. I didn’t.
What are you doing here?
Getting a free lunch.
Why, murderer, WHY?!
Because I’m hungry.
Hungry for sin!
Look, it’s just a burger.
Well, you’re just a bitch!
Without hesitation, Eve punches the girl in the face. Pandemonium
Eve grabs the tongs from the grill and begins chucking still smoking burgers
at the tourists.
Whores! Filth! Swine! Did you doubt me? Did you doubt my power?
Some flee, others take cover. Everyone screams. The cook
flails his arms and bellows nonsense.
You have to pay for those! Security! Drop the tongs! ALL WILL PERISH!
Eve wings a burger at the cook. It hits him in the face
and he goes down.
Oh my God! MY EYES! MY PRECIOUS EYES!!
Jean grabs Eve’s arm.
Run, you psycho!
They run for it, vaulting the wooden fence and heading
EXT. THE ROAD – AFTERNOON
The sun paints the clouds in hues of orange and red. Eve and Jean walk
back along a rural two-lane road surrounded by corn fields and sporadic
At what point during the past week did I ask you to introduce me to ignorant
It was just something I thought you’d be interested in!
What? A cult?
It’s not a cult!
Tell that to the guy in the pig suit...
Did you like any of it?
I liked throwing beef at people. I don’t know about the rest.
It was supposed to be educational.
It was. I learned that idiots are powerful in groups.
Why do you do this?
Throw every idea I have back in my face?
I don’t know. Stop coming up with stupid ideas.
Jean speeds up, walks past Eve, and continues down the
Jean! Come on! I was kidding!
Eve follows, trailing behind her.
EXT. ROAD – LATER
Still dusk. Jean’s car is parked along the roadside, resting on
the remnants of a gravel driveway leading to nowhere. Jean sits inside
her dark blue VW Bug, staring angrily at the dashboard. Outside, Eve shouts
at her friend through the window and tries in vain to open the locked
door. She curses and pounds on the glass.
EXT. ROAD – LATER
Eve sits on the ground, tossing stones into the road. Jean rolls her window
down enough to speak through.
What time is it?
The window rolls up again. A pause. The passenger door
opens. Eve stays where she is for a moment before getting into the car.
INT. CAR – LATER
Jean and Eve drive in silence. Eve turns on the radio. LOUD MUSIC BLARES.
Jean turns it off. Eve turns it back on. Jean responds by switching it
off. On. Off. On. Off. This continues until Jean smacks Eve’s hand.
Eve responds by smacking Jean’s face. They exchange blows as the
EXT. MALL, ENTRANCE – EVENING
A huge, concrete eyesore ringed by marble columns and asphalt. Jean and
Eve stand at the entrance, watching people filter in and out of the massive
glass doors in front of them.
Jean says nothing.
Eve heads towards the doors. Jean waits a moment before following.
INT. MALL - SAME
A deceptively sterile, brightly lit testament to the great empire of commerce.
Jean and Eve follow MOTHERS WITH SCREAMING CHILDREN, groups of TITTERING
YOUNG GIRLS, and BALDING OLD MEN. This flow of human traffic carries them
past various shops filled with useless amenities and lit by garish fluorescent
INT. MALL, FOUNTAIN – CONTINUOUS
They stop at a fountain bordered by palm trees and an escalator; a crossroads.
Jean sits down on a bench.
Fine. Eve walks away.
A MAN IN GLASSES, wearing a faded t-shirt two sizes too
small, sits down next to Jean. He clutches a bag of clothing and BREATHES
LOUDLY through his mouth.
INT. MALL, CLOTHING STORE – SAME
A kitschy, cramped store stocked with loud and exotic clothes. Eve examines
a rack of shirts. Nearby, TWO BLONDE GIRLS talk on cell phones as they
shop. Eve looks up at their incessant CHATTERING to find the girls facing
the store’s entrance, where a YOUNG MAN stands, talking on a cell
phone and waving stupidly at the girls. They wave back, making UNINTELLIGIBLE
GIGGLING SOUNDS as the young man responds with equally annoying GRUNTING
Eve just stares.
INT. MALL, FOUNTAIN - SAME
Jean watches TWO YOUNG BOYS hitting one another with foam bats. Over and
INT. MALL, MOVIE STORE - SAME
A dank, dimly lit hub for electronic media. Racks of movies and related
paraphernalia line the walls. Eve watches a bank of nine or so TVs set
into the wall. On every screen are various movies showing ridiculously
buff, screaming men with guns kicking Nazis and clutching American flags
amidst numerous explosions.
INT. MALL, FOOD COURT - SAME
A cavernous room comprised of advertisements and greasy burger huts. Amidst
a sea of loud, feasting people, Jean sits. Next to her, a FAT WOMAN gorges
on fast food along with her equally FAT HUSBAND. TWO DIRTY CHILDREN run
by, chasing a chicken.
INT. MALL, MUSIC STORE - SAME
A simple, oblong room filled with rows of CDs. Eve examines a rack of
“New Releases” from a slew of seemingly identical bands. She
looks up to see three signs dividing the store’s selection into
“Rock/Rap”, “Rap”, and “Country”.
Next to Eve, A WOMAN WITH SAGGING FEATURES argues with A PORTLY MAN over
a CD. They make ANNOYING SCREECHING SOUNDS; like vultures squabbling over
INT. MALL, FOOD COURT - SAME
Jean sits alone, drinking a Slushie. Eve approaches and joins her at the
table. A DIRTY CHILD runs by, chasing the same chicken. He is pursued
by a WOMAN WITH A HORRIBLE PERM clutching a SECOND DIRTY CHILD. Eve and
Jean watch them go.
I love people.
You find what you were looking for?
It’s cool. Are you hungry?
Oh, that burger didn’t fill you up?
Vegans need to learn how to grill.
Come on, I’ll take you to Denny’s.
Jean gets up.
How about Eat ‘N Park?
I thought you hated that place?
Well, I mean... They’ve got a salad bar.
If you like that sort of thing...
Jean smiles. Eve gets up.
What? I’m just saying, is all...
Come on, let’s get out of here. This place smells like children
and Pine-sol. They leave the food court.
EXT. MALL, ENTRANCE – EVENING
Eve and Jean exit the building. Nearby, TWO SECURITY GUARDS try to subdue
a CRAZED MAN WAVING A BUTTER KNIFE. As Eve and Jean walk by, a THIRD GUARD
runs in from off-camera and tackles the man. A BOY HOLDING A BALLOON watches
the two girls as they leave.